By Susan Brown
The ground is soggy from another passing deluge of cold rain. But after days of miserable weather, the sky is crystal blue and cheerful. The winter sun is slung low in the sky, blindingly bright but offering little warmth.
It’s Sunday afternoon at the farm – the day that is dedicated to the children whose varied needs have brought them to Courageous Connections. Before the classes have even begun, three volunteers are clustered around Remi, running hands down her legs feeling where heat is radiating outward. A call is made to Kathy Sanders, one of the founders of CC, and an experienced equine manager.
Remi is not showing any distress, so the verdict is made to go forward, just as five-year-old Adrian, the first client, shows up. He came to CC last March because, as a kid on the autism spectrum, he deals with a lot of behavioral challenges. At first glance not much has changed about him. He’s still tiny, still wearing a huge blue coat, still full of chatter, and still barely as high as Remi’s belly.
But there is a difference. Instead of wandering aimlessly around the arena, Adrian approaches Remi and offers the horsey handshake. Smiling, talking, and laughing in pure delight, he runs his hand over Remi’s side. Then, all business, he darts across the arena to get steps that will raise him up almost level with the horse.
“I’m so strong!” he declares as he wrestles the steps across the dirt. Shelly, the volunteer, lets him bring the steps almost to the horse and then takes over to position them beside Remi. Adrian confidently hops up the stairs and, as his tiny fingers slide gently across Remi’s coat, the cascade of chatter fades. With surprising seriousness in a boy so young, let alone one with challenges, he accepts the suggestions about the best way to groom the horse, carefully following directions, clearly showing care for Remi’s comfort. He uses three different brushes, trying to fit them against his small palm. Under Shelly’s encouraging direction, he strokes the bristles across Remi’s shoulder. The horse swings her head around to eye Adrian.
“She’s looking at me! She likes it!” He breaks into another infectious giggle. Remi drops her head and flicks her ears in contentment. Adrian keeps working.
When he has removed all the mud, Adrian hands back the brush and begins to chatter and giggle again. He has joyfully spent an intense 15 minutes focused on a task that is physically and mentally demanding for any child his age. For a few minutes, he kicks a gigantic ball around the arena with Shelly, then pauses to bring it over for Remi to inspect. Friendly, respectful...radiating happy satisfaction.
Children on the spectrum may have difficulties following directions, taking things slowly, showing concern for other people and animals – and above all, managing the crippling frustration that tsunamis through their minds when situations are not what they expect.
Barely a few months have passed, yet at the Courageous Connections farm, Adrian has learned to climb the steps to Remi’s side, brush her with calm gentleness, and above all, to face this task with happy confidence. A significant feat for this very small boy who, despite his many challenges, has learned to care for this very large horse.
Learn more about Susan Brown @ Susan Brown Writes
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